When does love turn from a blessing to a curse?

When does love turn from a blessing to a curse?
When does love turn from a blessing to a curse?

Throughout the ages, philosophers, writers and scientists have tried to understand the state of mad love and the reasons that push the lover to turn into an executioner, committing against his beloved, the most heinous crimes that shake humanity.

What is pathological love?

All people seek a feeling of love, as it is a source of happiness and a harbor of safety, but the feeling of love turns for some people from a positive indicator to a negative indicator, destroying any relationship, when the excessive feeling of love begins, to become a tool of power, oppression and control on the other side.

Pathological jealousy

Psychology experts agree that pathological jealousy, or what is known as Othello syndrome, is one of the most dangerous types of pathological love, as the name of this disorder is due to the English psychiatrist John Todd, who chose this name in relation to the Shakespeare play, whose hero Othello killed his wife Beautiful for allegedly betraying him.

As for Joanna Rosenblum, a clinical psychologist, she considers this syndrome one of the psychological disorders, in which the patient is constantly preoccupied with misleading thoughts about the betrayal of the life partner, without real or realistic evidence.

The person suffering from pathological jealousy usually suffers from behaviors such as stalking, stalking and some acts of sabotage, which may reach the point of using violence towards the life partner.

Among the reasons that lead to pathological jealousy is a lack of confidence in oneself or others, and a permanent feeling of inferiority that is fueled by sediments from childhood, the most important of which is the fear of losing a loved one.

This feeling may worsen into complex psychological problems such as bipolar affective disorder, or obsessive-compulsive disorder, especially if it is accompanied by addiction to drugs and alcohol.

Love of possession and possession of a partner

If hurtful jealousy stems from a poor sense of self, possessiveness, according to Dr. Lisa Firestone, director of research and education at the Guindon Society, stems from that inner desire for people who involuntarily push them to love someone's possession, through excessive attempts to control them, And controlling the management of his life, as well as focusing on his negative qualities, as a way to calm their troubled feelings.

Dr. Lisa Firestone adds that there are some cases that suffer from a love of ownership and control, as a result of some psychological or mental illnesses, such as schizophrenia, obsessive-compulsive disorder and organic brain syndrome.

Suspicion and obsession

No one disagrees that doubt turns love into a hell that burns both sides, as psychiatrist Daniel Block says, The seeds of doubt begin with simple actions, but they may carry a meaning, and pathological suspicion is generated when there are changes from the other side, so delusions from the patient’s mind begin. By widening the circle of suspicion in the actions of the partner, who may be completely innocent, and does not intend any treachery.

Block adds that the human personality, which is dominated by a sense of inferiority, is subject to pathological suspicion, because it did not receive enough love from childhood, so there is a belief within it that it is not worthy of love, and that the other party will abandon it for any reason.

Can sick love be cured?

Block asserts that the attempts of the wife or husband to understand the partner suffering from pathological love and deal with him with caution, away from raising his suspicions and provoking his feelings, may be somewhat beneficial to coexist with some cases; But in severe cases, it poses a threat to the lives of spouses and to their psychological and emotional stability; Especially when exposed to abuse or any form of violence.

Here, psychotherapy and pharmacotherapy, which include antidepressant and antipsychotic drugs, must be used to confront paranoid thoughts, relieve stubbornness, and treat the accompanying emotional disturbance.

According to Block, the results of treatment may be very positive, when psychotherapy and pharmacotherapy are combined with behavioral and cognitive therapy, and coordination between individual therapy and treatment that includes couples.

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